POEM STARTER
Submitted by snoop
Write a poem about something getting washed away, either literally or metaphorically.
Control
Control.
I need control.
When I feel I’m trapped I can’t breathe,
I can’t think,
I can’t function.
The solution is control.
Control, control, control.
_“I’m in control.”_
__
_Right?_
I can’t control the weather-
If it’s too hot to run outside.
I can’t control how often I get to see you-
If my mom thinks it’s “too much.”
I can’t control my mind-
If I’m sane or broken or okay.
I can’t even control my own fucking sleep-
If I escape my mind before 2:45 am.
If I had a therapist,
They would probably tell me to think of what I can control.
That sounds reasonable, right?
I wouldn’t know.
I’m going insane in my own head,
Dying in the prison that is my mind.
I’m drowning and I don’t know who could pull me out from the water.
But it’s okay.
I have me.
And I think she might want me dead,
But it’s fine.
_Right?_
So here’s what I can control:
I can control if I smile or not-
If I let my dead eyes take over my face.
I can control if I make an effort-
If I try or let myself fall to pieces in this chair.
I can control if I shut them all out-
If I blast music and stop interacting.
I can even control if I grab those scissors-
If I go for the _real_ control.
But I don’t want that choice of control.
Anything but that option.
Because for every bit I gain,
I lose more.
I know that.
I know it’s wrong.
_…right?_