When you look up at me

And give that tiny little smile,

I die.

You rip the breath out of my lungs,

My heart can’t remember how to beat.

How could it, when you’re looking at me like that?

Every one of my limbs feels tingly,

And there’s this perfect warmth spreading through me.

You take my hand and run your thumb over my knuckles,

And everything in me s h a t t e r s.

I try to smile back at you. Act normal, act normal. Can’t you see what you do to me? I shift my hand and wonder if you feel the same. How many people do you give that smile to? Could you ever see me as more than a friend?

But there’s some part of me that hopes. That says no, no that smile is for very, very few people. You don’t take other people’s hands like you do mine. At least, not that I’ve seen.

And I swear I saw jealousy in your eyes. I had my hand interlocked with another girl, and you saw from across the room where you were. That expression… you don’t wear that over a girl you feel nothing for. You came over and wrapped your arms around my shoulders, I let go of her hand to take yours as you whispered in my ear.

“Hi.”

And in your voice I could hear that smile, that smile that kills me kills me kills me. That smile that makes me feel like I’ll never be cold again, that smile that launches fireworks in my chest. I don’t know if I can take this much longer, because sometimes it feels like I really might die.

But if you’re the reason my heart stops beating, I would happily die a thousand times over again.