dear chiyo from a few months ago,

i hope you dearly enjoyed

thinking that amy

could still be your friend.

truth is, she doesn’t want you anymore.

she made a new group of friends

for a reason.

and matt?

don’t be silly now,

he hasn’t shown up,

probably making his own friends

while you’re over here

suffering.

maybe it would have been better

if you didnt say

“abc for rp”

when you were a child

and met him,

because those six years of friendship

are over now.

hold those two closely in your heart,

because they’ve already moved on

and it’s time to open your eyes

to other possibilities now.

it may seem unfair,

that He is targeting you alone,

but your life is just beginning.

there will most likely be

worse events to happen,

like your parents dying,

even though your mother

is what made all this happen.

…

you hate her inside,

don’t you?

that lingering sense of hatred?

you share one thing about yourself,

and she takes awake all you ever knew.

ironic, right?

we’re giving therapy to each other,

although you don’t know me,

and you can’t talk to me?

we’re both suffering through this,

just through different time stamps.

the one above may know

the right path for me,

but He betrayed me.

He made sure that i would never,

never

feel the same about long term friends

again.

i don’t feel like getting too attached to

j,

because god might take her away too.

i can’t even imagine how that would go.

she’s the only friend i have left.

i mean, that is close enough to me.

who could i turn to?

if she leaves somehow?

i probably wouldn’t ever recover.

but this…

this is something sinful.

taking someone away from their only source

of happiness

just for the goddamn fun of it?

why

why

why

why

why

why

why

why

why

me?

life tends to fall apart

when you’re a teenager.

i should have known that,

but i could never have known

that my happiness would be thrown away

at the fucking sake

of “it grows character.”

you know what?

i’m done.

i’m done.

i’m done.

i’m donE.

i’m doNE.

i’m dONE.

i’m DONE.

i’M DONE.

I’M DONE.

I’M DONE.

WHY THE HELL

DO I,

OF ALL PEOPLE,

HAVE TO SUFFER

FOR SOME RANDOM PERSON’S

SINS?

I HAVEN’T DONE

*ANYTHING.*

I HAVE DONE NOTHING

WORTHY OF THIS PUNISHMENT.

WHY FOLLOW *HIM,*

IF *HE* WILL ONLY STRIKE YOU DOWN,

THEN FORCE YOU

TO PUT A SMILE

ON THAT TEAR TAINTED FACE OF YOURS?

THE BEST PEOPLE IN LIFE

ARE TREATED THE WORST.

SINCERELY,

SOMEONE WHO WILL NOT SLEEP TONIGHT.