Bang! Something, something deadly, bashed against the dean’s office door. The hefty five panel oak door quivered in protest. Dean Winterbottom shoved his velvet fainting sofa against his office door. He lifted it on one side to sheild the door.

“As you were saying Professor Valient?” Winterbottom asked.

“Please, call me Tiberius. While I have been abroad during most of your new tenure, I hope to foster academic congeniality. As I was saying most serious leprechaun research occurs in the Cooley mountains but my studies of Foy cave related research pointed me in a different direction. So naturally I went to the coast,” Valient said.

“Oh, naturally.”

Boom! The distinctive sound of a large muscled shoulder slamming into a thick wooden door reverberated. Dean Winterbottom yelped in a decidedly unmanly way. He ran behind his desk and started pushing it towards the doorway. Professor Valient helped. Together they hefted the desk against the sofa in front of the dean’s door. Dean Winterbottom slid to his bottom on the floor.

“So the coast do you say?” Winterbottom asked.

“Yes, yes, I conjectured that the mythology of a pot of leprechaun gold at the end of a rainbow was born of a Viking gold hoard from first Norse age. I explored Cork and Waterford and struck gold in Wexford,” Valient said laughing. “Made a funny there. Struck gold I did that by golly.”

“Umm, what now? Are you saying you actually found gold at the end of the rainbow!”

Thwack! The door frame made a sickening crack. Dean Winterbottom braced his back against his desk to hold the door. He regretted his recent recommendation to reduce campus security.

“Well rainbows are optical phenomena, Dean Winterbottom. And yes, yes I did. Here in my satchel. Lovely 8th century pieces. It all goes back to the meaning of—“

“What the hell! Are you telling me a leprechaun is trying to break in here and get back its pot o’ gold?”

“Leprechauns! Don’t be ridiculous. No that’s the vengeful ghost a Viking warrior. Wee fairy folks, really, Dean.”

Thwack! Splinters exploded The axe’s edge glinted through the crack in the door.