Words are wasted,

On those who do not listen.

So I learned to be silent.

You made me be silent.

You said I was so well behaved,

So gentle, so obedient.

But I used to cry,

And you never noticed.

You drowned yourselves,

In your ignorance,

And I don’t even have a right,

To be mad.

I don’t have a right,

To hate you.

Because you never did anything.

And maybe that’s why,

I can’t stand you.

Maybe because you left me alone,

Whenever I did as you said.

When I pretended,

I was sweet and childish and loving.

You don’t know how I burn,

Because I still have _years, _

__

Until I can leave this damn house.

Until I have a choice,

To pretend my way,

Instead of yours.

Because I’m always going to hide.

But at least I’ll have a chance,

To choose what they see in me.

Not what you want to be seen.

You don’t even know,

That you caged my will,

Starved it,

Quietly begging for mercy.

You didn’t notice,

That I was a marionette,

That you pulled the strings on,

You thought that’s who I was.

And I’m not sorry anymore,

I don’t care,

That you don’t like the real me.

Or you wouldn’t,

If you ever saw her.

I don’t care,

That I may never be myself,

When I’m around you.

That I don’t feel safe,

Or that I’m loved unconditionally.

There’s always a catch.

You will always love me…

If.

If I do this,

If I stay away from that.

If I live the perfect life,

That you planned out for me.

And I’m not crying.

Not because I don’t know,

If I love you anymore.

Not because I look around,

And want the connections I see,

All around me.

Not because I know,

I’ll never have that.

I just.

I don’t want there to be,

A price tag on your love for me.

Why can’t _I_ be enough?

Please.

I just

Want _you_,

To say,

I’m enough.