“I am so confused” Jillian cried to me. Her sobs racking her ill frail body. “Jill you need to breathe” I said, trying to keep the panic at bay, but knowing how hard it must be for her right now.

Jillian was my best friend. And even if we had only known eachother a few years at that point, I don’t know that I had ever or will ever love someone more than I loved my Jill. Just that morning Jillian had been laughing in the courtyard with me. Her hair up in a bun, small peices dangling from the back. Her head was in my lap and we were reading poetry. It sounds like the perfect romance doesn’t it?

Sadly to say it wasn’t. She was from a town north of me. Where everyone was religious, and at the time, that was expected. But we made the mistake of having our romantic moment in her courtyard instead of mine.

Her mother saw us, and shouted out the window. Calling us all sorts of names and words I had never heard. I could see the dread in my Jill’s eyes, she knew it was bad. She knew how her parents would react. We both scrambled up from the ground, and brushed off our floral dresses, brushing our hands together. Her mother approached me, furious. “Have you ever kissed my daughter” “No maam” and that was the truth, we knew the risks and no matter how much we craved for the others taste, we abstained. “Have you forced my daughter into this” “no maam” And again I insist it is the truth. “Then you must stay for dinner” Jill’s mother said with a grin falsely plastered on her wrinkled face, her gray hair shining in the sun.

Reluctantly I stayed and followed inside leaving my loved and scuffed brown boots at the door, and brushing off my dress once more before coming in. “Jillian, fetch me two glasses will you” her mother cooed, in a voice too sweet, to melodic to be genuine. But my sweet Jill, scared of the consequences scurried off. When she came back with the two glasses, Her mother filled each with juice, Handing the darker of the two to her daughter. “Now drink up and both of you hurry along” We exchanged glances, as it was odd to be told to go out this time of day, the sun was starting to set, but we obeyed.

Once both glasses were empty I helped my Jill out of her stool and we ran off. Before we reached the tree line, my Jill called out to me, sweat starting to bead on her face “Something is wrong” She took a few staggering steps and with a feeble scream her beautiful figure collapsed.

I scooped my Jill up into my arms and ran into a barn near by, she was still concious but in obvious agony. I layed her down in some hay while i found some blankets and water, And I pulled her into my lap, gently stroking her hair. “Its ok my love” I whispered pressing a light kiss to her forehead.

“I am so confused” Jillian cried to me. Her sobs racking her ill frail body. “Jill you need to breathe” I said, trying to keep the panic at bay, but knowing how hard it must be for her right now.

“I think she put something in my drink” my Jill said, seeming to regain some sense. But the way she looked into my eyes the way she pleaded, made me feel something inside. “What if I die Summer, I don’t want to die” My Jill pleaded. And I knew what she wanted more than anything if these were her last moments.

I cupped her cheek into my hand and she melted against my touch. “I love you summer” She said as her eyes drifted shut. “would you kiss me, just once” she asked. And all I needed was for her to ask I gently took hold of her other cheek and kissed her, small, gentle, but the most lovely thing I had, or ever will experience.

“I love you too” I said to her, cradling her against me. Her eyes still closed. Quickly my Jill deteriorated. Fading peacefully in my arms. Not dead, but miserable. And unlikely to last long. Days later when someone found us, broken bruised and on the edge of death. The only thing i knew, was that she was my secret rebellion and I was hers.