D. J. Keyes

A creative visionary trying to find their way in this world. A published author of short plays, as well as a short story. Currently in college. Using this app to keep my gears moving.

Writings

Followers

Following

D. J. Keyes

A creative visionary trying to find their way in this world. A published author of short plays, as well as a short story. Currently in college. Using this app to keep my gears moving.

Writings

Followers

Following

Green Swirls

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

I thought my herbal martini tasted weird this morning. That's when I saw that I was drinking it out of the toilet bowl. What I thought was olive twist turned out to be something much nastier.

Suffice it to say, that olive twist soon became an olive flood. Now I had a toilet bowl full of last night's wine and cheese, a killer hangover, and no herbal martini in sight. I couldn't even look away. I w...

Humour

Action

The Super Exciting Times of Man

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

-> Wake Up

-> Eat Breakfast

-> Shower

-> Get Dressed

This was my daily list. Recently, I've been feeling like shaking it up. My coworkers have been making me jealous with their exciting trips and fun hobbies. But, I feel like starting it slow.

-> Wake Up

-> Shower

-> Eat Breakfast

-> Get Dressed

It was a weird start today. Of course, eating a naked breakfast was a freeing experience, but it was...

Humour

Thriller

The Office Bust

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

"A woman has two busts," Claudia heard from her chortling boss. A small man with too big shoes, he only really saw the one bust on Claudia's chest, but he tried to pretend he knew better. It was the 1950's. According to him, "a man knows better, something you better know."

Claudia felt the sleeve on her dress drop a bit when he left. She laughed it off until her chortling boss was well out of sig...

Romance

YA fiction

Wedding gown

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

Twenty hundred horses walk into a bar. And the bartender says “Twenty hundred horses? I couldn’t possible serve twenty hundred horses!” The twenty hundred horses then say “NEIGH” because they are horses.

Fred went into the bar a day before and asked for a drink. “I’m getting married to Fred”, he says to the bartender. “How vain…”, replies the bartender.

Wedding gown is adorned....

Western

Thriller

I Dream Of Pangaea

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

My parents surrounded me—my mother to the left, and my father to the right—and explained it like this. There was a time long before I was born, when all of the world’s continents were connected. It was called Pangaea, and it was a lot like my parents’ marriage. At first, the continents were happy, and lived together in harmony. Then, they slowly separated, drifting apart until they were on opposit...

Romance

Simmering The Can

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

(I'm doing the opposite of this)

What a damn time,

waiting for my little man,

as boiling acid is dumped onto him.

What a reckless little man.

He caused this, by the way.

He thought it would be funny

to turn on the stove he can't use,

open our good bologna and a soda,

and cook "bologna soup" for shits and giggles.

Whatever.

I'll burn him out

of his rubble prison.

It's my duty to save him,

even w...

Drama

Poetry

Stripping

D. J. Keyes

2 min read

It would be a long journey across the cold High Plains to find my way home in western Kansas. I knew it would require mental fortitude to even brave the storms, much less face the beating cold and howling demons. But, I knew what was waiting for me. And I was ready to brave the storm.

My journey started by climbing a hill. One of steep length and smooth, snowy terrain. Every step, my feet would s...

Adventure

Perpendicular

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

Graph paper left out for the students of summer school. Some jerks draw square dicks. Most just look at it, too afraid of the pressure. No one really appreciates it.

One girl struggles with her hyperbola. In her struggle, she is brave enough to approach the graph paper and ask for some help. She admits what she does not know and says she wants to learn proper math. Graph paper helps her.

Graph p...

Romance

The Margins

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

12/1/25

21:02

Experiment M: Day 2

After finalizing my sketches for its circuitry and rudimentary design, I began working on Martin's OS. It is currently stationed inside Martin's stomach, just above the battery compartment and cooling system. Once I confirmed that the breakers were properly working, I propped Martin up on its legs. I weighed Martin for documentation, and have found this 24in bas...

Drama

Horror

Roommates

D. J. Keyes

1 min read

I sit in an empty apartment.

I dream of you.

What you are, I can only see

painted on my computer.

A wonderful man

with black hair,

a turquoise sweater,

and a savvy gaze.

In my empty apartment,

with my broken lightbulb,

I don't see much light

or another friend.

But when I see him,

I feel less alone.

He makes my heart flutter,

but I can only feel his love

when my sweaty body shudders

and I imagin...

Poetry

Romance