I feel like a failure

I feel like a mistake

I feel like know one lokes

A friend started wanted to talk

Saying I was being rude

Yes i was unknowingly

Was being rude

But I didn’t dare bring it up

I thought they didn’t need to hear it

And im struggle long with these emotions

It made me cry

Made me feel like a failure

Feel like they didn’t want me as a friend

Made me feel like they don’t like me anymore

But yet, what about the way they treated me?

I always felt like they didn’t like

I always felt like we weren’t close friends

I feel like I am just there in their life

Waiting to be pushed away

And being used

They yell at me a lot

And I don’t dare bring it up

I get kinda attached to firiends

And I don’t like ti have a conversation with them at all

Cause if I do

The hey will leave

Just like I he rest

I know these things are caused by the both of us

I know it probably my fault

I will stop with what I am doing

And yes I did feel rude doing it

But yet, I thought it was roleplay

I thought I was making a joke

Whenever I do roleplay

I put stuff into my characters I don’t as a person as a whole

I make them witty

Kinda rude

Kind

I made my characters a person of myself

And my hidden emotions

Hidden emotions I don’t put on my face

I put my anger into my characters

My sadness

But yet that made me feel like I lost a friend

I feel like they won’t understand

Even if they might

I don’t how to deal with this

This has never really happened to me

I know if they did face to face

I wouldn’t show any emotion

I would be stone hard

And look like that I doubt care

But in reality i do care

I will change

It’s just that I am not used to it

I know this person won’t read this

But I am sorry

More sorry than I ever could be

It’s not right for what I done

You say you forgive me

But yet I feel you never will

And that a piece of me is now missing

Sorry

Sorry

Sorry

For everything I have ever done that was ride bad or mean ti you

I feel resentful for everything i have ever done

(This is just a ranting poem for me to get control of my feelings. Sorry if this makes no sense. Also!!! This isn’t true anymore!!)