_You shouldn’t have done that. _

_Why would you do that? _

The pit in her stomach was endless. It clawed at her insides, eternally dissatisfied. It pulled and knotted and choked her with its disgust, sucking away the transient relief.

_How could you do that?_

Her throat was thick and suffocating, it strangled her and forced tears from her eyes, burning against her cheeks. She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak, only shudder with the wracking sobs that consumed her as she drowned in her grief.

_How dare you do that? _

Heat beat down on her, it smothered her with humidity and relished in her collapse. Her head spun. She couldn’t think straight. Her legs couldn’t bear her burden any longer. What if she disappeared? Ripped herself out of existence, charred the remnants of her presence. Maybe then she wouldn’t have to feel this. Maybe then she wouldn’t have to feel anything.

_You don’t deserve that. _

Oh, she really didn’t, but she couldn’t see past the blur, couldn’t think past her own selfishness. Her face was wet and cold, but she was blazing, trapped in how she burned.

_If only you had been better than that. _

She wasn’t. Oh, but what she would do to be worth_ anything _more than that. She would claw herself out of the deepest abyss or simply lay, heaving on the ground, begging to be rid of this. She didn’t want this. This was what was due, of course she knew that, but it seared her heart all the more to know that _this_ was the justice she had earned.

_You will never be more than that. _

The hole deepened as the truth sunk in, pulling her down to earth. She let one final drop slide down her face, and let herself succumb to the grace of numbness.