I am in so much pain,

It won’t stop,

It never will.

At least I know why,

But it hurts,

God it hurts.

I am so tired,

I can barely stay awake,

Can barely write this poem.

But at least I get to sleep,

At least I get to dream,

At least I get a break.

Who am I kidding?

I don’t think that way,

I only see the negative.

I see the pain I am in.

I see the tears.

I see the exhaustion.

I don’t just _see_ it,

I _feel_ it.

Why can’t it go away?

Why can’t I be normal?

Why can’t I be healthy?

I see myself being alone,

But being scared of people.

I see myself wanting to get out,

But hating the noise.

I just want to be normal,

Why can’t I be normal?

Why do I hate the noise?

Why do I feel this way?

_Why? Why? Why?_

Why do I have to miss out on teenage milestones?

Why do I have so many doctors appointments?

Why do I have no friends?

Because I am homeschooled.

Because I am sick.

Because I am weird.

_Why?_

_Why?_

_Why?_

I want to be normal,

Why can’t I be normal?