part of

holding

onto something

between

immortality

and death...

“hello…”

“oh, yes, this is him.

how are you?”

“good, good…

so what did you think?”

“mhmm, mhmm…

yeah, i… i…

i figured i would…”

“mhmm, yeah, ok,

i… maybe if i…”

“no, i understand,

but i have a few more books

that i have writ… uh-huh”

“could i just send those

over to…”

“mhmm, uh-huh,

i just think you’ll…”

“maybe the other books…”

“ok, i see, i’ll…”

“yes, you too…”...

she sent me some photographs

that we took together

back in high school

some were of us at cemeteries

or in basements -

one or two at bars

we would sneak into

and i noticed

our eyes

back then

they were clearer

than the photographs themselves

they were sparkling

and in-the-moment

and free and whimsy

they were black

yet colorful

they weren’t worked

forty hours a week yet

or

late on bills

or

...

a cat spilled my beer

onto my laptop

after a great day

and better evening

after we found love

in our eyes again

i heard the beer

fizzing and running

under our laughs

on top of the keyboard

and i jumped up

and threw the empty bottle

towards the cat

and it hit the thing

and then i grabbed a towel

and craddled the laptop in it

i wiped it fully

while shouting and cursing

about the cat, about...

every night

someone steals the moon

right from the sky

and it never gets dark anymore

it only stays light

and oh

how i miss it

how i miss the

big beautiful moon

the moon

i haven’t seen

in months

i can barely

picture it now

yes, he says to me,

that is what happens

when you pass out

by seven

on my bar top

awakening only when

i re-open

the damn thing

at seven the next morning

and i guess

h...

first snow

under your feet

crunching better than leaves

the sound of shovels in driveways

heat you...

i stared at my dog

as he laid on the sofa

lying and peaceful

like he was in a coma

i tapped his head

and asked him to wake

he opened his eyes

and gave his body a shake

i said sorry to bother you

i just needed to ask

how you could sleep all day

and not complete any task

there’s so much to do

and never enough time

there’s so many hobbies

while the sun still shines

and time is so fleeting

and i ...

a couple of priests

walked into the bar -

not a joke -

although we all thought it was

and they were smart enough to sit

at the barren end

of the bar

away

from the hooters

and hollerers

but they all still made

their jokes

and the priests

pretended they couldn’t hear

they just ordered their pints

of heineken

and talked in low whispers

to each other

i kept staring at them

but they didn’t seem t...

i recently wrote a poem

about wanting to have peace

total peace

with no dogs barking

or cars honking

or loud commercials

or people on speaker phones

etc etc

and all i want

is a book, Bach, a fire,

and my own goddam farts

and i got some questions

about why i kept the farts in

the poem

and the reason is

tonight

my wife had dinner plans

and i stayed home

so i put on Bach

and grabbed a book

and li...

i just want

peace

no more trains

or dogs barking

no more car horns

or shouting outside

no more speaker phone

or cat’s meowing

or hissing

or scratching at their own shit

no more children

in general

no more commercials

louder than the show

no more clearing of throats

no more small talk

nothing but

Bach

a book

the crackling of fire

and

my own

goddamn farts...