Once there’s a teacher from Alabamer

She tried to show them kids some grammar.

She said it’s “I saw”

“I seen” ‘s against the law.

And if y’all say it again, you’ll get the hammer....

I wish you wouldn’t cry. I’ve always hated the sight of your tears. I remember years ago when you were just a toddler, your mother and I took you to Sea World to see the dolphins, and you laughed and laughed during the show. But as soon as the show was over, we took you back through the aquarium and you saw one of the dolphins behind a cage. Oh Lord, the tears that came out of you that day. _Daddy...

Money

My husband

Watches every penny

Until I can’t breathe

Thinking about the bank statement

Every time I want to purchase

A sweater, a pair of jeans, McDonalds.

Something for myself. something for my two daughters,

To ease the sadness of the chaos of life,

To ease the deficit on the statement of our love....

I use you for sitting.

Men have a lot to say about that.

Sit down and shut up!

Why don't you get up off your fat ass?

It’s always a struggle, figuring out

what a man really wants from you.

“A heart-shaped ass is best,” he told me.

My love handles sort of make mine an

Upside-down obtuse triangle.

I wish more than anything that the sharp

Errors of my angles could be rounded

Into something attr...

Shooting stars fall from the heavens, and,

Instead of working, doing, making sacrifice, I pray;

I make a wish on debris that burns upon

Entering the atmosphere. Millions of meteors collide

Each day without our notice and so my fucking falling farce isn't that special. My father called his belief in the Creative force of the universe faith.

Jeminy Cricket said no request was too extreme as long as...

I stood in front of the classroom, hoping to solidify my persona as a capable adult. So far, in the short time I had been working with this group, it seemed I had only demonstrated my ability to make a fool out of myself. How could a room full of middle-school-aged children make me question my life’s purpose? In the days leading up to this crucial, last evaluation day, these monsters had turned al...