You weigh on me

Like an anchor,

Halting me

From moving on,

From escaping into

Open waters.

You dictate my life,

A riptide

Guiding me,

Gentle yet forceful,

Toward the endless depths

With high tides and whirlpools

Ready to drag me under.

You latch on

And pull me down

Wanting to make

A matching tragedy of me,

Wanting fiercely

To give your misery

At the bottom of the ocean

Some company.

I wade and wade,

Treading water

Day in and day out.

Day in and day out

You try to drown me

In the same tears

You cried back then.

But on I swim,

Not very strong,

But persistent.

I escape you,

Just as sleep and happiness

Escape me,

But I live with a constant fear

Of the day I can’t.

The day when

Your arms coil around

And snap me under,

When my head dips below the water

And my arms are too weak

To fight to the surface,

When I gasp for air

And the salty tears

Fill the emptiness

In my shallow lungs,

When my body falls

And the rays of sunlight

Cascading through the waves

Shrink from view.

Consciousness,

Life,

Slips further away

Into the tides.

My fear nears with

Every passing moment.

The currents are quickening,

And the pressure is building.

The waves are towering taller,

And the water is always rising.

I can’t continue like this forever,

And I know

I can only outrun you

For so long.