**Tiana**

“Are you kidding me?” I ask with a flat expression.

“Excuse me?” The waiter is tall and thin, almost wiry, with thick plastic rimmed glasses and messy hair. He was maybe 21 or 22.

“Are you joking?” I try again.

“I didn’t say anything, miss.” This is true.

“Because it’s not funny. Not even a little bit. So if you’re trying for funny, you should know - you’re failing.” Sheesh. When did I get so mean?

“I honestly don’t know what you mean. Is there something I could —?”

I cut him off and don’t let him finish. I don’t want his pity. “You didn’t just bring this card to my table?”

“Umm.. yes, I did, but —“

“Did you read it?”

“Of course not —“

I interrupted again, even though I knew I was being a jerk. I would just have to tip him big later. “Of course not. Of course you didn’t. Of course you brought a mysterious card to the table. How could you have possibly known what it said or how I would feel about it? You know what?”

“Umm —“

“Never mind. I’m sorry. Thank you for your service this evening. Aside from the cruel joke, it was a lovely dinner. Have a nice night. Keep the change.” I placed a hundred dollar bill on the table, not stopping to consider that I wouldn’t have any cash left for the taxi home. I had to get out of that restaurant.

**Shawn**

I watched as the most beautiful - and possibly the craziest - customer I had ever served rushed out the door of Enzo’s. Still in a daze, I started gathering plates and glasses to clear off the table. Enzo’s isn’t the classiest place, but we are under strict orders not to leave dirty tables if we see them.

As I’m cleaning up, I notice the dark skinned lady left the card that seemed to offend her so fully. I consider not reading it but decide I’ll provably never see this woman again, so it won’t hurt. Besides, I played a hand in her embarrassment, even if by accident.

The note is written in thick strokes as if the person was pressing the pen hard into the paper. It’s shorter than I expect. It reads:

_Is your laugh sponsored by Dolby Surround Sound?_

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Ouch. No wonder she ran away.

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