I skipped meals, but never skipped a workout.

I skipped a snack, but never weigh in.

I hated the way I looked, I fell in love with my illness.

Anorexia was a form of comfort, like a hand knitted blanket.

I loved ana, she was always there for me. She made me feel pretty.

But that only lasted for a short time because then to feel that way again: i would have to become thinner.

that's the thing with ana, she's never impressed, she will always want more.

you will never feel confident enough in that dress.

so i always tried to impress her, skipping more meals working out on more days.

but then i fainted in the school hallway.

couldn't eat without falling ill.

my hair fell out.

my life fell apart.

i began to hate her.

i began to recover.

i no longer love my illness, and i will put up a fight.

but every now and then ana wins;

and that's what keeps me up at night.