I wanted to be someone

People could look up to

And feel hopeful.

I wanted to always be the person

That gets back up

And keeps hoping.

I

Still

Do.

Lightning crashes

Around

Me.

Water pools at my feet

Or maybe

It’s tears.

Or maybe

It’s blood.

Maybe this time I cut

Too deep

But my brain hasn’t processed the pain yet.

Maybe this time when I

Fall asleep

By brain won’t wake me up to greet the morning.

I think if I were ever to

Actually

Follow through, I’d write a note

To everyone I know

Maybe even one to the kids I pass at school

But barely know them

Maybe to my principal

Because can you imagine your own student killing herself?

I can’t.

But I could so easily

Make it a reality.

The truth is,

Humans are fragile

We think we can solve everything with our intelligence

But so little can shatter our mental state

Make us go insane.

Maybe

It’s just

Me

That’s fragile.

Maybe

For once in my life

I’m doing

Ok.