It was 7 years into the marriage, for so long, because I had always seen the cycle with the adults in my life, when they would yell, cuss, throw things, situations would become physical. That I thought it was just part of marriage, I also had my own mother telling me everything would be ok, I had gone to her multiple times trying to get help leaving and getting away from him. When I would work up a plan with my mom to leave she would make me feel like she was cornering me, using god because I was religious at the time and didn’t know better, that me and him were meant to be and that god was against divorce. After so many attempts to get out I was forced to indure emotional, mental, sexual, financial, physical and physiological abuse. When I got to the point where I started to realize that what I was going through wasn’t normal, I started to fight back, I specifically remember the day when he threatened me he was going to leave. On that day it was like a switch flipped in me and I lost all give a fuck and told him there was the door, that he wasn’t going to threaten me anymore. That I wanted him and didn’t need him, and that he wasn’t going to straighten his shit up or I was going to leave and he could be by himself for all I cared. He gave me an astonished look as if he didn’t ever think I would put my foot down, and he was surprised that I would even stand up for myself.