We used to make memories

We used to share

Laughter at the table

Now vanished into thin air

Now the holidays are just another day

Put up the tree

Decorate with lights

Knowing things aren’t right

And maybe they won’t ever be again

A constant tug as an attempt to make amends

But how do you fix something that’s already been broken

How do you find the words when others rather not have spoken

Shut out

Cut out

And away

Didn’t think it would happen this way

Didn’t think the picture would break

So now I’m older

I see the story for how it really was

And it makes me sad

Makes me upset

That all those times weren’t as I remember

But yet I should forget

So now when I look at the full picture the cracks start to form

These issues were already in place before I was born

The cracks were disguised

But now gone is the glue

Now distant from you

And having to comfort someone who wants to see you

So now I sit here as the trees taken down and now the lights are on the ground

Times changed now

Things are different now

And the thing is I don’t know if this will ever change

The constant tug of war is no more

Fighting a loosing battle and a long drawn out war

So no more

Take the loss but don’t forget who’s near

What I’ve got now will not disappear

So when the holidays come I’ll be grateful spending time with the ones I came from

So maybe the battle I lost was secretly won

I still remember