We both sit on the sofa with his friends.

They are all being so loud.

L O U D

I inhale and exhale deeply.

Ayan is laughing with a bunch of people I don’t know.

Time is moving so slow.

I just want to go home.

S L O W

"You okay?" Ayan mutters and squeezes my knee gently.

I don’t answer. I lean my head against his shoulder. He leans back on the sofa and wraps his arm around me to pull me closer.

It’s so loud.

L

O U

D

"We can go home if you want?"

I shake my head slightly. I don’t want to ruin his time here. "No, it’s fine."

"You sure?"

I nod.

H

E A

V

Y

I want to shut my eyes but I know if I do I’ll probably fall asleep or just never want to get off this sofa.

I slouch. I get comfortable. I do not care. I cannot bring myself to care.

H E A

V

Y

It’s moments like this where I didn’t feel like I existed. Not dead—just non-existent.

DIE

D I E

I

E

(Scene from my Manuscript)