WRITING OBSTACLE
A character's worst fear comes true.
Use personification to give the fear a voice and describe how it takes control of the character's thoughts and actions.
Evolution
I know you hate me, but I am here to protect you. Thousands of years of evolution has yet to render me obsolete. You may not be being chased by a tiger or struggling to find food, but like it or not my existence has a purpose. And yes, it is all about you. And whilst it may not be life or death, right now I am here to save you from a classroom of judgemental vultures. They’re obviously all going to think yours is the worst idea in all of history. Dozens of eyes will stare you down. You will slowly start to flush and stutter, and it will be the most embarrassing thing to ever happen to anyone like…ever. Why are you putting yourself through this? You should probably just fake an illness.
Wow! This is actually really good! I love what the narrator is saying, and how you portrayed the fear. Just a little suggestion I have is keeping the Voice consistent.
I noticed at the beginning the narrator was using eloquent language “…render me obsolete… Whilst it may not be life or death…judgemental vultures…” (which by the way, I love), but you changed the voice some near the end “…it will be the most embarrassing thing…Like….ever… you should probably just…” It sounded more casual and messed with the pace a little. Overall this is very good work! I hope this helps!
This is very good!
