04.09.2017

Dear Diary,

I woke up this morning feeling really dizzy. My head was pounding so loudly I heard it knocking on my skull, like at my cousin’s house when they knocked down the walls – only this is in my head. Everything felt fuzzy. I heard static. I guess that’s what you get for going clubbing on Monday night. My sister is calling me; I have to go to school now, completely hungover. I’m glad she’s taking me, though – I couldn’t be trusted on the bus.

08.09.2017

Dear Diary,

I guess it wasn’t just the hangover. You wouldn’t be hungover this long; it’s not possible, is it? Okay, I just Googled it, and it said very unlikely. Then again, Google also said I shouldn’t be hearing static. I still do. It’s getting louder – an annoying buzz I can’t seem to turn off, and it’s taking over my brain. I wish I could tear it out. I’ve got school to focus on!

11.09.2017

Dear Diary,

The static got louder. I can’t block it out anymore; if anything, it blocks out all else. It’s horrible, really. In history today, Elle asked me for a pen seven times because I couldn’t hear her. I’m already struggling to make out what my teacher is saying, and now she thinks I’m mad at her…

12.09.2017

Dear Diary,

You guessed it! It’s getting worse again. I can hardly stand straight anymore; my balance is totally off. I’m starting to believe someone put something in my drink when I went out. Or maybe I’m hallucinating? Or just plain crazy? I don’t even know anymore. I’ll wait it out for a while, and if it isn’t better by the weekend, I’ll tell my parents or ask Reddit. I don’t know how reliable that place is, but maybe, just maybe, I’ll fall into an internet rabbit hole that’ll block out the noise.

14.09.2017

Dear Diary,

Officially been ten days since the static came. I told my parents. They’re worried I might be losing my hearing or going insane. I vote for the insane thing – I think everyone in this bloody place is insane, from the person who may or may not have drugged me to my parents who think this might be it, and my cousin who thought she could pull off a hot pink sweater. Please, Tilda, with your eyes? Stick to pastels next time; you aren’t fooling anyone. Back to me – I’m just insane; this will all pass. My sister just came in – she said she was calling me for the past few minutes; dinner’s ready. I thought it was the static.

17.09.2017

Dear Diary,

I went to the doctor today, waiting for the results. The static is getting worse. Getting bad signal (in my ears and on my phone). The internet didn’t help. Finn thought he could snag a date with Elle. She said no. We aren’t talking much anymore.

20.09.2017

Dear Diary,

This is the worst day of my life. The results came back – my hearing is messed up. I’ll always hear static unless I get surgery, but if I do, I’ll hear nothing. I don’t know what I’d rather – I’d hate both. The static might be less lonely… I have to go now. I can’t stop crying, and my tears are smearing the page.

26.09.2017

Dear Diary,

I’m getting the surgery. The static is unbearable.

16.11.2017

It’s quiet now. I think this might be worse.

16.11.2023

Dear Diary,

God, I forgot all about this. I just wanted to say… well, you get used to the silence. Don’t give up. At first, it’s scary – alone with your thoughts, not hearing what people are saying, not listening to music or watching TV – but it doesn’t mean you lose your right to dream, think, and speak. You’ve learned sign language. You found a boyfriend, and he’s amazing. You’ve moved in together. You’ve worked your way back into life and gotten out of the depression and the silence. You’ve got a job you love and a supportive family. Life is good. Don’t give up; it gets better, I swear. And I would know, wouldn’t I? I mean… I’m the future Eva, and she knows it’ll all be okay, because she’s done it all before.