If only the world had shown me a little more mercy then life would have been easier to live. I wouldn’t have spent years of my life surviving people and would have known it was always best to keep away.

I would have happily lived out my life without resentment for things I hardly understood. I wouldn’t have had so much emotional baggage that was a burden to carry. I wouldn’t be so conflicted about what I was supposed to be doing. I would have maybe been a little further in life.

Except, that’s not the reality of things. “Just because it could have been differen’t doesn’t mean that it would have been better.” Better is just pure fantasy of the mistakes I still would have made but cannot know about. Another set of issues and problems for an alternate life because I cannot escape suffering.