It all began with a yellow jacket.

About two months ago I spotted it in a charity shop and though mustard yellow, it had deep pockets. So I bought it and wore it everywhere, pleased that I could fit my phone Inside the jacket without it poking out.

Then I saw leopard print boots, and peacock earrings, and added it to my wardrobe.

In the weeks that followed I became more and more unhinged, wearing snakeskin print, crimping my hair, even wearing a bright beret.

Only last week my friends gathered and sat me down with pity in their eyes.

“Listen, I think you’ve lost your sense of style…”

I laughed at them, and found a way to direct the attention elsewhere.

But now, holding neon headbands, I think they’re right.