This isn’t what I wanted

She said as she starts to pull away from you

It’s all your fault, it usually is

Your too clingy they say that’s what it is

Your therapist says that your too much for people

Like a strong cup of coffee or a bitter wild strawberry

She says I cut because I want attention

That I only have friends for my own satisfaction

She says my parents didn’t love me properly and that’s why I act out

You hope and you pray that the only friends that you have don’t hate you too

But you know deep down that they’re starting to

I don’t know how to untighten my grip

From the people that I love

Treating them like a trophy I won

When you clean it too much the paint will rub off

You chip away at their sanity with every word you say

Terrified that one day they will walk away

This life feels impossible without them in it

You just feel like one day you’ll ruin it

This isn’t what I wanted