“if i knew you didn’t love me, i wouldn’t have done what i did”

god, it took my words and breath

i could hear you say, you didn’t want it to hurt

but it was too late, i had taken critical blows

we were supposed to be simple and now it’s so much more

i cried in the arms of my best friend that night

begging past me to just leave you alone

i didn’t know you would grow to love me so fast

i thought w...

sick in the middle of my bed

fever low and yet i was sweating

it was 3am and i thought of you

for years i thought of you

i was going to call you to bring me soup

let me smell you near me

let me feel your touch

soothe away the heat and cold

remove my blankets and just hold me

in your curative arms

run your hands down my back

lay in my sick and stay

in those years i thought of you

i thought of...

it never came when i wanted

ran by it’s own schedule

the one time i called it

it pat me on the shoulder

like i was nothing but a kid

“it’s not your time yet” it said

voice distorted and yet i understood

i would have to wait until it wanted to get me

and so i did, although rather impatiently

i tried to recreate my call to get it back here

i think it heard but chose to ignore

it left me waiting...

“where will you go” he asked

“i’m not sure, i’ll figure it out”

“just stay here”

“you know i can’t”

“i love you”

“i know but you lie”

“i won’t anymore, i promise”

she sighed “you promised yesterday and last week and last year, your word is nothing with the amount of times you’ve ran it into the ground, i’m leaving for me and when i stayed? that was just for you. i’m not waiting for you to h...

in their own way, each uniquely divine

the sun first caught my eye

bright eyes flaming with every grin

she burned me in way i couldn’t resist

with her warmth and embrace seared into my soul

i fell in love like never before

i thought i could tame her

how ridiculous it seems now

the idea of a mortal ever capturing her heart

she loved me in her own way

a ways away from my mundanity

she broke my heart...

we sit still, the dust creating halos around our heads

sometimes i turn just to look at your nose

just to remember if my mind changed what it looked like

the sun makes your hair look so vibrant, i think

you’re more beautiful than i remember

i look away, insecure and nervous about the lack of charge in the air

it’s too comfortable, too soft but that is also you

you were never afraid of not ...

love is the lie that keeps us alive

love says “you are my everything”

love drives you to the airport

5 in the morning, droopy with sleep

love helps you with your luggage

and gives you a kiss before watching you leave

love says “i understand you so well”

love supports your career

makes you lunch the night before work

love adds a note with a heart

and that extra snack you love

love says “i’ll neve...

to survive is to sleep, wake and eat

to eat at least twice each day

to sleep for hours on end

to survive is to take no risks

protect the body and mind

survival makes viciousness gentle

it’s all you can do to see another day

but to live

to live is to sing, dance and scream

to eat when you want something good

to sleep when you want to dream

to live is to take risks everyday

from saying hello to a ...

it was supposed to be me

i did everything right until i couldn’t

when my older brother couldn’t

i went to college, graduated with my degree

when my younger sister couldn’t

i lived without fear, became a leader

when my younger brother couldn’t

i expanded my view, studied gender, politics, art and anything i could get my hands on

it was supposed to be me

the shining jewel of my immigran...

she sits in a dark room

waiting for her chance to play

i locked her up because it hurt too much

to watch her hope and dream all day

she calls my name softly

like she knows me so well

i shut her out because she does

and i can’t stand that fact

one day i’ll come back to her

play and jump and sing with her

i swear i will be able to take care of us

like others couldn’t, didn’t when we were young

sh...