My worth is determined by how pretty I am. How slutty I can be. How fast I can get him off.

My worth is not determined by my personality. I can be empty and hollow on the inside. As long as my shell is pleasing to the eyes, I’m okay.

I don’t cut myself. I don’t want to ruin that pretty skin of mine. Instead, I try something like substances. I can be still be valuable that way.

Natural beauty ...

I want to scrub my skin

Until it bleeds and tears

You say it’ll never happen again

My skin doesn’t care

My skin remembers

The bruises and cuts

My skin slowly withers

No if, ands, or buts

It may have been an “accident”

But my skin doesn’t lie

It holds resentment

Until the day it dies...

Your cries shattered my heart

And I gave you an embrace

I never wanted you to be a part

Of the trauma I had to face

On the bed our mother lay

And we held her hand

Not knowing if she’d see another day

A thought we couldn’t stand

To the ICU she went

And they swore she was depressed

She just wanted to forget

The thoughts that she’s repressed

She wrote us all a letter

And told us how she felt

“...

Tighten your grip around me

And hurt me some more

Maybe you can see

How you rotted my core

Women have worked so hard

For girls like me to leave

But you haven’t left me completely scarred

So I just take a rest and breathe

Push me up against the wall

Don’t let me go

Cause we know I’m too damn small

To go toe to toe

I love you in an unhealthy way

And I know I’m better gone

But I’ll do anything f...

a diorama of stability

a poetic gesture

it’s not a nobility

to not crack under pressure

move me around

from city to city

you think it’s profound

but no, it’s just a pity

you’re an absent mind

who’s in love with the neglect

you assume i’m blind

to your lack of respect

i’ll never be like you

a hopeless mother

this trauma is not new

you’ve passed it to my brother...

You painted me black and blue

Blue must be your favorite color

And I haven’t had a clue

What I’d do with any other

I never knew you had an eye for the arts

But the way you shaded me is so pretty

Your malice shot me right through my heart

It’s truly such a pity

You’re doing what my mother did

Continuing the family line

It brings me back to when I was a kid

And I always had to hide

You should...

I use sleep to escape,

The dreadful feeling of being alive,

But my head seems to mixtape,

The bad memories I’ve had to survive.

One night it’s bliss,

The other I wish I was dead.

However, It’s hard to miss,

This disgusting feeling in my head.

When I’m awake I feel the same,

I want to just forget,

But It’s really just a shame,

To be trapped in this mindset.

In REM I lay,

Wishing for the day,

Bu...

Am I contagious?

They seem to avoid me like a virus,

And look at me like I’m outrageous,

With a bitter sense of highness.

Before you touch me,

You need to scrub in,

Use the soap and count to three,

And treat me like I’m vermin.

I’m just a nasty disease,

With no one to look after,

No room for worries,

When I’m preparing for the rapture.

My whole life I’ve been told,

“You better stay away”,

I...

As I walk

My shadow lingers

My presence stalks

With morbid fingers

I’m not to be seen

Even for a minute or two

They do call me the queen

Of being see-through

It’s not my fault they don’t see me

I’m just glad they don’t stare

They treat me so differently

When they don’t know I’m there...

Since I was six,

I’ve had my fix,

Of Jesus Christ,

And all things nice,

Alongside the hanging crucifix.

Church beat it into my head,

“It’s a sin to wish you were dead”,

“Your mother is going to hell,

As the Bible has to foretell.”

As rapists are accepted into heaven,

Because they love the lord,

The hypocrisy feels like a weapon,

And my real emotions poured.

It is not a sin to love who you lov...