you’ll always cry but never laugh,

surround yourself in darkness

only to see a small glimpse of light.

you’ll die but never give birth,

you’ll exist but never live.

you’ll drench others’ paths,

with your tears.

pain is all you cause,

yet we still love you,

or rather-

we read books while you die,

stay inside while you die,

cover our heads while you die.

you cry and die,

but we focus on ourselves.

y...

I miss you

You don’t miss me

Me, me, me, always,

Always so self-centered

Centered in chaos,

chaos covering my hands,

Hands drenched in blood,

Blood dripping like water.

Water from my eyes.

Eyes that cried because of you.

You don’t miss me.

Me, myself, and I.

I miss you....

I lost it.

I lost it, and I don’t know where.

The store, my house?

Somewhere?

I’m crying and mascara’s running down my face,

stupid stupid.

I loved it.

I loved it.

I had it for four years,

and I just lost it in two hours.

I don’t know where.

Here or there?

Stupid stupid,

I can’t even talk about it.

It’s like grieving for one person all over again,

and grieving for someone who never died.

Oh my gos...

A pepper.

Hatred is a pepper,

but I don’t hate her,

so I hold it in front of her face.

I don’t hate her.

I can’t hate her

when she made me numb.

Emotions drained,

eyes closed,

stabbed, in pain,

can’t say I wasn’t warned.

but dang, it doesn’t even hurt anymore.

Numb, numb, numb,

like I’m losing too much blood,

too much emotion,

too much negative energy

that I’ve been wasting on

writing your name...

Write me a poem,

because you can’t face your emotions.

Take a piece of your soul,

mix it into the writing bowl.

I can read your face better than your texts,

so write me a poem.

I won’t decode it.

Write me a poem,

tell me what you feel.

But don’t write too deeply,

because it might become real.

And if you haven’t already,

you might lose touch with everyone.

Because you’re fading.

Instead of writing ...

I didn’t trust easily.

I made up these rules against it.

But here you made me believe

that breakin’ down my walls

would benefit me.

So I tore them down,

walked myself sore,

tried to catch up with you.

But my walls caught me

they fell down on me.

don’t know what to do.

feeling so confused.

why break down walls

if they’ll just fall~?

Cuz holding bricks hurts,

but not as much

as what I see.

you’re w...

I’m sittin’ by our lake with a little regret,

listening to the trickling water.

not knowing what I’m even here for.

I hate the way you controlled my life,

emotions can’t live on

when they’ve been numbed.

And you been playin’ me

as if I were someone dumb.

But I survived you,

so I’m not really some

kind of person who would take that BS.

Got the roots under my feet,

but I can’t seem to find my grou...

someone will save you,

when you get to be too much.

someone will help you,

when you’re losing your touch.

and that little angel?

she’ll guard you for lifetimes.

keep your life away from crimes.

she’ll hold you close like a friend,

never letting your life end.

she can’t save you from your tears,

but she’ll guard your health.

she can’t save you from people,

but she’ll save you from yourself.

and the...

i don’t get hurt

and you don’t have to pretend

you like me anymore.

in a way, this is

exactly what we wanted.

our mutual happy ending....

When you fall in love, you can lose your mind.

Lose the garden and the thoughts of closure,

because flowers can grow, weeds too.

But they can die off rather soon.

And when you’re in love, they never thrive.

Releasing a feeling that’ll never survive.

Because how can you be happy, truly,

if you rely on a person to be?

Your mind is a garden, your thoughts the seeds,

you can grow flowers or you can gr...