For someone like myself

The only alternative

To spiritual living,

Is the lonely comforts

Of isolation due to

Willful intuition

That has never worked before.

Also known as

Insanity....

A designer of life once

Inhabited this space

And grew to become

One in the same

With her

Undeniably magnificent

Attention to detail

While lying under the soil

Of the garden we called

Home....

In a rather valiant attempt

Failure still prevailed.

Unlike my cumbersome lifestyle

That was much too familiar

And comfortable,

I’ve settled for a birthing

Opportunity to enjoy the space around me.

For once....

The knife belongs to me

The words don’t

I don’t know who’s they are

Gods maybe;

I know

Left to my own devices

I would have left your

Body cold

With the blood spilling over

Your stomach

And not

Told you i loved you....

It’s hard to imagine

The parties

The laughs

The juvenile drinking

Led me to here.

A room enclosed with others alike

Struggling with similar insecurities

A room of men who had no where else to go

Who have exhausted other options

A room full of addicts.

I am an addict.

Fuck…...

Across the hall she sat in a freshman seminar,

bored and probably dreaming of the sleep missed while an old scholar in brown corduroy pants lectures a group of eighteen year olds on the requirements of undergrad.

He was a young janitor by way of the family business, who inherited its clients after the last owners were brutally taken from this world in the tornado three months prior. Not Scott’s ...

Across the hall she sat in a freshman seminar,

bored and probably dreaming of the sleep missed while an old scholar in brown corduroy pants lectures a group of eighteen year olds on the requirements of undergrad.

He was a young janitor by way of the family business, who inherited its clients after the last owners were brutally taken from this world in the tornado three months prior. Not Scott’s ...

Witnessing the beauty,

Watching every wrinkle

On her pale skin

Is intoxicating

After a murder.

Finally a smile forms

And justice is done

By a swift slice to the neck

Of an ignorant one.

I’ve trained her well

She listens in admiration for what i have

Or lack

That’s why i use her for my midnight attacks.

Holding her distance at arms length

Was her idea,

I’d rather haunt her insides,

For now...

Since the age of twelve

You’ve accompanied me

Through countless transitions

Of stiff beds.

Sat patiently waiting for me to

Wrap up a physical recess

With a few women who

Wouldn’t know me if it weren’t for the bottle.

Absorbed, at this point

Gallons of self inflicted tears

A quart of blood dripping sweetly from my nose

And a stench of fears and confusion i passed down to you.

I thank you

Ruf...

And with that

Who is alone?

You trapped in a mental cage in a van full of

Partygoers?

Or maybe you,

Stuck in a bathroom with the needle barely

Keeping you company.

Perhaps not.

We are all one

Strung along and placed in perfect order for one goal.

For one purpose.

Making it to the end,

To where our souls dance on a calm white canvas

In a way that is innocent and youthful.

For eternity and o...