Feeling off but still waiting.

~Mirc~

I was feeling a bit off today,

but I still went on my merry little way.

My day felt strange,

but I kept walking on.

I did everything the same today,

the same as the day before.

Everything felt off today,

and I felt something coming.

Something I couldn’t put a finger on,

no way to know what.

But still, I felt it—

something was coming.

When I got home,

the quiet depths of my life surrounded me.

I sat down in the silence,

waiting, watching time fly by.

Something felt off today,

and I still didn’t know why.

I sat and waited,

waited and sat.

Then I realized what was wrong.

Today, I wasn’t me.

I haven’t been me in a while.

Too long, or maybe too late.

I might never be me again.

And you’ll never see her again.

She isn’t she.

She hasn’t been she for a long time.

No one noticed—

not even her—

until this second.

This second when the thought clicked,

clicked sharp into her mind:

she isn’t who she used to be.

Is it too late to turn back?

Maybe so.

So she sits and watches the clock tick by.

Time moves slow when you’re watching,

but when you’re not, it flies.

You miss the chances,

the little openings,

while waiting for something to change.

That something will never change,

never change the way you ask.

Your wasting your time,

but you can't let go.

Even if you want to,

you can't.