Could you imagine never seeing a sunset?

In my country of Lumin, it is always daytime. The sun is forever risen, never to fall. Rain or shine, she's up there. Never truly dark, but sometimes clouds can dim her shine just a little bit.

Everyone that surrounds me is filled with an endless joy that seems to be exuding out of them from every angle. Some may say they have a sunny disposition. But me on the other hand, I crave the darkness. To be able to hide away from everything around me, even to be able to hide from myself sometimes sounds like a dream. I definitely do not follow suit with my peers when it comes to remaining positive and happy alongside the sunlight that never seems to fade. My soul feels drawn to the moon and the person I could become beneath its subtle glow.

And that is how I got here.

Surrounded by strangers in every possible direction in a stuffy subway car. Despite my current fear of what lies ahead of me, my curiosity has gotten the better of me. I need to know what it's like to watch the sun set and the moon rise. To feel the atmosphere grow colder and darker around me as I make my way to wherever it is I may go. To finally draw the curtain closed around me, and sink into the anonymous form of myself that can only exist among the darkness.

But, I have to make it out of this subway alive first.

On my left, an older man stares at me. He remains unmoved after politely smiling in his direction, and his unwavering gaze all but burns a hole in the side of my face.

So much for that sunny disposition, huh. Maybe he is not from around here.

However, a couple to my right carries the exact opposite attitude of the man to my left. As they talk, they laugh and smile back at the people that make eye contact with them.

There is beauty in it, the way it seems like most everyone mimics the sun's shine as they interact with other people and I imagine with themselves, but it only makes me feel as if there is something wrong with me. I am not always so happy-go-lucky. I get angry and upset a lot and sadly the people closest to me probably don't want me around all the time. I crave being able to disappear into the shadows. There has to be more people that feel this way, it can't just be me. But maybe, I am the first to want to escape so badly.

My seat neighbors a window where you can watch the buildings and streets fly past. My lack of luggage tells everyone that I don't plan on staying wherever it is that I am going, but I just need to get there.

The sun still shines on the metal roofs of the passing buildings, telling me that we are still in Lumin. Nearly 500 years ago, a curse was placed upon the land of Lumin making it so that the sun never set. Legend has it that the ancient moon goddess, Diana, sought revenge on our people for angering her with their lack of sacrifice. Thus, she took away the moon leaving the sun to stay awake in its absence for the rest of time. The country just below Lumin, Temno, did not suffer the wrath of Diana. They must have hit their quota on sacrifice, or whatever, and they were spared. Personally, I am still not sold on why things are the way that they are. Whether or not its truly a curse from a moon goddess or a celestial anomaly, I don't know. All I do know, is that I need to be free of the sun's undying light.

"I love your shirt!"

My head whips around to where the sound came from. I find one half of the couple on my right staring at me kindly with a toothy grin.

"Oh, me?" I point toward myself, "thank you! Green is my favorite color."

"Mine too!" They replied, "that shirt is such a unique shade."

One day a long time ago, I think this shirt used to be a darker shade of blue. Overtime, being exposed to nothing but the sun, it has faded into a swampy green color but I still love it. Adorned with embroidered flowers along the bottom hem, this shirt is one of my favorites. I wore it all the time, which probably helped in speeding up it's fading process.

My brief interaction with that stranger distracted me just long enough to not notice the changing of the sky beyond the train windows. With a crash, my small carry on bag hit the floor as I quickly stood and took my place at the window. Using the back of my hand, I wipe away the fog I continue to create as I press my face upon the glass.

Yellow into orange, into red, pink and purple. Melting ice cream beyond the clouds dripped between the rooftops and the trees that passed me by. We must have just crossed the border of Lumin.

7:53 my watch reads.

In only 7 minutes, the sky will be darker than I have ever seen it.

Staring so hard into the sky, I wish I could take a picture with my eyes. I have never seen anything so beautiful. All at once, I think about the way watching the sun rise and fall everyday would affect me. Life would feel so much less unattainable. Everyday, I see nothing but light. Aside from a few clouds, everything is always bright and in full color. My day to day feelings and actions almost never reflect the state of the sky. I wouldn't feel the constant pull to be positive and bright alongside my peers. My mood-swings and my outbursts would feel less like failing. Watching the sun slowly but surely reach its peak in the sky every morning to then watch it settle into rest for the night would make everything seem a little bit more realistic.

Its 7:56 now. The sky has become an almost lavender blue as the sun retreats behind the trees. Awestruck by the sky, I forgot to pick my bag up off the floor. Reaching for my bag, I remembered I brought my disposable camera. Winding the small plastic wheel with my thumb, I leveled my eye along the viewfinder.

Snap!

If I remember correctly, I have one picture left. I will have one of just now, and one in a few minutes when darkness surrounds this train.

I patiently watch the sky as it grows darker by the minute.

It's 8:06 by the time the sky turns a deeper shade of blue, and it's 8:14 when the interior train lights come on to adjust for the pitch black sky outside.

I rest my head against the seat after I plop down. Content in knowing that I have done it. I have made it somewhere where the sun truly does set.

I probably shouldn't get off this train in the dark if I don't really know where I am, huh?

Oh well, the rest of my journey awaits. Like the sun, I will take this time to rest, and I will rise to the occasion in the morning.