Since I can remember, my life has been a war

I have battle scars to prove it

Whether from my own hand, or by the hands of another

The wounds are jagged and forever torn

Since I was three,

There was “something wrong with me”

My parents always claimed but didn’t want to see

“If something is wrong with them, something is wrong with me.”

An ideal that can’t be true, it’d be a catastrophe!

So they treated me the “same”

They found an easy target, a person to blame

Whether true or not, it still remained

I was banashed to my room until I am complicit and sane

Music was my only way out

Headphones on, crying silently

pain keeps pouring until my eyes reach their drought

Then I awake to another day of family rivalry

Abuse after abuse, I still keep in my head

I replay desires of wishing I were dead

Even fighting my death, they left me on read

Showed me then they would rather have me gone instead.

Have I survived? It is not a yes or no question

Have I survived is about learning an important lesson

It is about protecting your peace and showing I am not like them

That I desire to show love as not earned but an expression