I look down at his small body and close his eyes. I pull his favourite baby blue blanket a little closer to his face, his body still warm. It looks like he is sleeping. I hear my sister stifle a sob behind me.

He gave us everything in this life. Every moment with him a rare gem, all the memories amounting to a treasure I buried deep in my chest. The only thing softening the goodbye was knowing that we gave him everything too.

Every kiss, cuddle, laugh, all genuine and of the purest kind. He watched us grow up, he saw it all. We were his and he was ours. We showed up everyday as ourselves, and so did he. Running out the front door at the first opportunity, getting into the garbage for the tenth time that month, and us, riling him up from his cozy spot on the couch only to smother him with kisses. It could be chaos, but I know neither of us would have changed a thing. It was perfect.

These moments flash though my mind as I look down at his still body and my heart beats a panicked tune. My mind refuses to accept the thought of never seeing him again, never running my hand through his curly white hair, or kissing that little brown nose. My heart threatenens to collapse on itself, but I need to be strong for my siblings. I take a shaky breath.

15 years of loving the best boy the world could give us. An old soul who grew up with 4 human siblings. There will never be a better buddy than you my sweet boy. I’ll love you until forever.