The first of February was an unseasonably warm, sunshine-filled day that brought me no joy whatsoever.

It was a Saturday, so I sat around in my room, blinds drawn, with The Paranoids blasting from my CD player- it was without a doubt my favourite CD I owned at that point, and I played it everyday.

James knocked on my bedroom door before opening it. He said, “Elena, why don’t you go outside, for a walk, maybe? It’s pretty nice out, you should take advantage of it instead of sitting in your room like this all day.”

“I don’t wanna,” I told him, my face blank. “I wanna sit in my room all day.”

“Are you sure…? This is the nicest it will be until spring, probably.”

“Yeah.”

“Your mom and I both think you should try to get outside a bit more, you know, and you really should.” He sighed and looked around my dirty room, the floor littered with clothes, magazines, books. “And maybe you should try cleaning your room.”

“Not in the mood,” I dismissed the idea with a frown and a shrug.

“And me and your mom have also been thinking that maybe you should get a job, or maybe join a club in school, or something like that. You should get out of the house more, Elena, and meet some people. Make some friends.”

“I don’t want a job.” I sighed at the thought. “And I don’t wanna join a stupid club. And I don’t want to get out of the house more.”

“Come on, Elena, at least try something…” Disappointment was prominent in his voice. “You have to do something.”

“No, I fuckin’ don’t. Leave me the fuck alone, willya, James? Thanks.” I flipped him off as he walked out in silence, shutting the door slowly behind him.

That night, at dinner, my mom brought up the topic of a job, or a club, or literally anything.

“No!” I snapped, scowling at her. “I already said I don’t wanna get a goddamn job! I don’t need to get a job, why the hell would I want one?”

“Well, I thought it might be nice for you to get some experience, some work experience, and it could get you out of the house more-”

“Oh, Jesus Christ, what’s it with you people wanting me to get outta the house? I’ll just fucking leave if you really don’t want me around so much-”

“No, no, Elena, that’s not it,” interrupted James hastily, his mouth a tense line. “We just think it’d be good for you, that’s all.”

“Well, I don’t think that.” I crossed my arms and leaned back in my chair, glowering. “And I don’t want that at all.”

“Elena, you are going to get a job, okay? You are going to work. Do you understand me?” My mother was fuming, so done with my bullshit.

“I’m not gonna!”

“Oh, yes, you are!”

“Fuck you, I’m not doing that!” I jumped out of my chair, dumped my empty plate in the kitchen sink.

“Elena!” She was at the point of shouting and stood up from her seat. “You will not talk to me like that ever again, do you hear me? And you will get a job!”

“Fine! Fuckin’ Fine!” I stalked away to my bedroom, screaming back, “I don’t fucking care!”

And then, I collapsed onto my unmade bed with a muffled sniffle, my mind raging. I played my music loud just to piss off my parents, who frequently knocked on my door, to which I replied, “Don’t wanna talk to you!”

Unfortunately enough, by the Monday before Valentine’s Day, I was starting my first day at my new job: washing dishes after school at a Tim Horton’s. And even worse, two other kids in my grade worked there, and they wouldn’t stop casting dirty looks in my direction.

I trudged home through the snow, in total darkness even though it wasn’t even that late, to my parents enthusiastically asking me how everything was. And the same the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day, even Saturday, but then that Sunday, Valentine’s Day!