I want to sleep.

I’m so tired and I’m so sick,

Burning in my eyes, sob, sniffle, weep.

Since I was born, I have been sick.

I stopped napping when I was four months old.

I was sick,

Even though I didn’t have a cold.

Insomniac sick.

Remember when I stopped sleeping entirely?

Because of the needles, the screaming, the pain?

You said it was an “active mind, wired differently.”

But I was only six- what was wrong with my brain?

You don’t know the things I could see-

Bats on the roof, people talking who weren’t there.

Why the hell won’t they let me be?

No, no, it was more than just a _scare_.

Remember when I threw up twice a day?

Until it was nothing by bile and yellow and ick?

“No, I don’t,” you say!

You never knew the insomniac sick.

You don’t know how crazy I feel!

They all tell me I am,

But it doesn’t seem real.

Scream, scream, a needle, the door goes _slam_.

I know I’m not out of my mind,

But it’s not meant to be like this,

It isn’t meant to hurt so bad inside!

If it is- how the hell is everyone else living like this?

“Sadistic, hallucinations, pathological lying, suicidal ideation.”

All the signs I’m gone, but I swear I’m not!

My only issue is I can’t go into hibernation.

“Sure, I’m sane,” I thought.

I swear to god my only challenge

Is sleeping an hour for every twenty-four!

My sanity I try to scavenge,

I don’t think it’d be so bad if they didn’t gaslight and scream and shame, I can’t take it anymore!

By the way, it isn’t cool

To sleep less than the recommend amount.

Or to have to leave school

Due to some “violence” or something you can’t recount.

I’m sorry, but I was six and innocent.

I wasn’t the violent one, I was the victim!

Let’s not talk about the incident,

I have faulty memory, your gaslighting system.

Insomniac sick,

You tear and you cut,

Insomniac sick,

You make me throw up all my guts.

Insomniac sick,

Please leave me alone,

Insomniac sick,

And mom, it’s not fault of the phone.

Insomniac sick,

I was 4 months old,

And then, I was only six.

It is chronic, not just a cold.

Insomniac sick,

Go die in a hole,

Insomniac sick,

You don’t have control!