This will probably only be 3-6 paragraphs long (editing note: holy lord of extermination this was a lot longer than anticipated)

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All of us learned to count to three when we were newborns. Now, we count the seconds as we run away from the Lie Exterminators. We simply wanted to play a prank on my mother, and now we have to die for it.

Yes, me, Wes, and Ander all knew that our lies were up. But that didn’t stop us from causing mischief. We disconnected the internet, stopping mom from working. She asked who the culprit was. We all said it wasn’t us when the exterminators knocked at the door. We escaped from the window, and now we are hiding in a coffee shop in the staff only room.

“Wes, what are we going to do?” Ander inquires, yet we all know the answer: the employees will tell the exterminators that we went into the staff only room, they will find us, and we will die. “I don’t know, Ander! I haven’t even had my first kiss yet!” A bit concerning that’s the only thing Wes has her mind on.

“But poor Samm has tried so hard to find love, and yet she still hasn’t found any…”

It’s a bit surprising that I got acknowledgment. I thought they were going to start rambling around. Instead, they’re just _staring… _“Oh, don’t worry about me, honestly, I don’t care a bit about romance right now— _HOLY SHIT MY ARM!_” Guess I forgot about the side effect of lying. Now I have five marks on my arm. “We’re sorry that you have to die this way…”Ander apologizes, knowing it isn’t his fault.

“But I thought you were going somewhere with that, Ander…” I speak without thinking, it doesn’t matter since we’re all dead in ten minutes anyway.

“No, I’ve been dating Wes. But I’ve been too shy to kiss her….”

_Uh oh. I think I’m going dizzy._

_He didn’t say that, right? He isn’t dating my best friend, right?_

_“I’m sorry, say that again? I’m not sure if I heard it correctly.” “Wes and I…” I don’t hear the rest, and I don’t really want to right now. There is no way my crush was dating my best friend, and I had no clue about it. I want to be mad but I have too much of a headache to right now, so I must use my words wisely._

_“Samm, are you okay?” I want to scream at Wes, because how could I be fine without Ander in my romantic life? And she took it all away from me. But she’s still my best friend and she didn’t know a thing about my love interests._

_My vision is blurring even more. All I see now are tan splurges and other colors placed on top. “I repeat, Samm, are you okay? How many fingers do you see?” I hold up three fingers. “I have four fingers up right now. Hey, Ander, she’s nauseous! I don’t know the cause!” It’s concerning she doesn’t know the cause. He told me he was dating her, and I immediately went into this state, does she not realize?_

_Wes puts her hand on my forehead. “Holy shit, you’re really high temperature! Ander, we need an ice pack, now!” As if that’s going to do anything. The hole in my heart will take forever to fix. I mouth something. Holy hell, I can’t even speak? Something is shutting my body down…_

_“I think this is the exterminator’s doing,” Ander shares his theory. “I think being shocked too many times from your arm puts in a chemical or something that puts you in this state. I can tell because your arm’s all swollen.” I can’t tell him that’s because bees love putting their stingers right onto my mark. But some of it’s the shock from my arm too._

_I wish I had someone to love, to hold onto right now. But Ander’s heart has gone toward Wes. He’s already gone, probably kissing her beyond my field of vision. He’s chosen her now, and I’m just a third wheeler._

_The exterminators are coming in now. Not that I care about living anymore. I’ve achieved one of my goals, and the only other one was stolen from me. I have done all I wanted to in this life. They can take me away._

_“Boss, they’re just teenagers. Give them until they’re eighteen.””No, lying is such a crime! I’ll spare them two days. Now, tend to this girl. She’s reacting to the stings.”They’re touching my arm!? Oh, lords, how it hurts! But… Now…_

Am I back to normal?

Hey, I can see shit again! How neat! Except now I only have two days to find love before I drop fucking _dead! _

“Samm…”

“Shut it, you two. I don’t want to hear your pities for how I don’t have a lover yet— you know how unnattractive I am with this waist! You both tossed me aside like I was some child you two were babysitting; and I sure fit the role, too, laying on the floor like that like I didn’t know how to walk or talk! Just…” I don’t have the courage to finish the sentence. But if I did, it would go something like _Just go make out in the hallway or something, lovebirds. _But I’m still in denial.

“You aren’t listening to what we’re saying!”

That’s fucking it. “And I don’t want to, either! Wes, you stole who I thought was my soulmate, my crush, the one person I taped to my locker! You saw his face multiple times, even teased me for it sometimes, and yet _you _were the one that ended up with him! And how long has this secret relationship been going on? Three years or so? Wouldn’t be surprised!”

I won’t listen to anything else. Nope, nopity nope no siree. They’re not worth any attention anymore.

“Samm, I think you’re beautiful, and I’m not just sugarcoating that as a best friend…” No, Samm, stop listening to her words! They’re tricking you into letting them be together! That’s their only goal in this moment!

—Is Wes _seriously _hugging me right now? For what reason? “Please stop crying…” Holy— I’m crying? How did I not notice? Ander’s staying on the side, like the cold person he is. That’s what I’ve noticed; with all this comforting, he’s done about 16% so far. He wouldn’t be worth it if all he would do is give theories about the exterminators and ask to copy off my homework.

“Sorry…”

“Wes, don’t worry, I’m fine— I mean, I’m better than I would be right now without your comfort.” I can’t risk going nauseous like that by lying again. Ander in the corner looks a bit jealous. He’s honestly lucky that he has a girl _to _be jealous for! He seriously needs some control in his life anyway!

“I can see why Ander fell for you.” “E—eh!? What exactly are you thinking about right now..?” Wes asks, pretending to be completely unaware of what was going to happen next. I have his girl hook, line, and sinker.

The brush of our lips feels like the reward of the century. I can tell she only grabbed Ander because he was the only valid love interest in her class at the time. But I can tell she’s happier this way because she’s not afraid to keep this going. Now that I think about it, Ander was kind of a jerk to us in multiple situations. We should’ve seen the red flags, but we didn’t, and somehow fell in love— well, I did, she just wanted to experience teenage “love.”

She pulls away now. I’ll let her win this time. “I’ll let you decide who you think is healthier. The one who made us break our noses and made our mouths bleed on that ‘amazing skateboard park deadly ride’ thing, or the one who cared about the beauty dysphoria you had hours later, and who let you cry onto her shoulder?”

Wes looks a bit nervous. “Does it really matter? I mean, we only have two days to live, so—“ Of course she’s indecisive. She’s always like this when it comes to big decisions. “It _is _important, by a long shot! You’re going to spend the rest of your life with the person you choose, Wes!”

But we both know she’s chosen me.