I pushed the door to the cafe open. I was met with resistance and an uninvited embrace with a closed door. Confused, I looked at the glass door that read ‘pull’. With embarrassed compliance I now entered the cafe.

The air felt warm from the espresso machines and faux fireplace heater. Holly leaves still hung throughout the fixtures of the shop. A surprising sight being a week into the new year. I found a table and chair and began setting up my laptop for work.

Waiting for the laptop to spin up and connect always made for a perfect window to scroll social media for the happenings of friends and enemies alike. I got in my few scrolls on my favorite social media app. Another repost of New Year’s resolutions, someone I knew in college vacationing again in Cancun. Business as usual. I gave the app a quick swipe up for a refresh before locking my phone to begin work when I saw it. My eyes grew wide and my mouth fell open slightly.

“Engaged?!” I whispered loudly. Quickly looking around to ensure I wasn’t seen as the crazy cafe lady, I began a brief but thorough investigation of this newly engaged couples’ profiles. They had only been together for four months. My laptop likely felt the cold shoulder as I ignored its request for password input.

Jackson and I have been together for 3 years and the mention of a ring tended to send us into a sensitive argument that never resolved itself.

“But where is my happiness?” Those words burned back from my memory into the forefront of my mind. That recent fight with Jackson definitely put us on ice. Now I was the last friend in both of my social circles to be engaged or married.

‘What am I going to do…’ I thought, cupping my face in my hands, trying to avoid a further spiral of thoughts and emotions.