7 years old

“Promise?” “Promise” We agree as we shake hands. Ella nods her head and we agreed to keep the promise. Until now.

Overview

When we were 7, we promised we would always stick together, no matter what. We were so close and she deeply cared about me. She ended up ditching me when I walked into her bedroom and she looked down playing with her sleeve and said “I’m sorry April but I had to” she said with her head down and I felt that. I exited the room with a pang of sadness hitting me hard and I heard her sniffing in her room. It’s so sad to see how separated we became and it hurt me a lot too. However I think she has moved on. She doesn’t care about me anymore and I wished we stayed as kids. Unfortunately, that’s not the case.

19 years old (present)

The problem was a boy. A teenage boy who she adores and hugs every damn day. “He is pretty funny tbh and I really like him! I think if you really understood him like I do then you’ll be closer to him. He stole my best friend and expects me to be happy for him! What world are they living in. Not planet earth clearly - Mars by the sound of it. He is sooo loud and all he talks about is himself. “Oh look at me! I’m so cool!”ewww. It’s really not ‘cute’ or ‘sweet’ as she describes. I just want to ask her “Ella, why are you dating him?” but she’ll HATE me so I zipped my mouth shut.

She should’ve noticed how I just go ‘mhm’ for everything because what can I say? Ella gets lost in her own world talking about Josh. I don’t find Josh interesting, exciting or perfect. I think he is smarmy and weird. They aren’t similar - maybe in their hobbies but not their attitudes. Ella is so naivë so if you slag him off, she will go ballistic. Rule number 1: NEVER disagree or mess with my ex best friend.

I really want to tell her how bad of a boyfriend I’m sure he is but I don’t want to step on their toes. I need to be happy for her and not be jealous. But I am jealous in a weird way. Maybe this is just how I am. It’s just when you lose a friend, it hurts. Especially if you made a promise. The promise between us.