How did it come to this?

How can life be so great and full yet feel so dull and empty?

So many things to live for yet all I wanna do is die.

I hold so many things in as it eats away at me.

So I lie awake in the middle of the night thinking of ways to kill it.

But how could I?

I couldn’t.

I wouldn’t.

But this dark feeling shadows my life like a storm that never ends.

Or a deep trench with no bottom.

Falling deeper and deeper.

Trying to find a way out or up.

Calling out for help yet no sound is to be heard.

Is it a sickness?

Does it run through my blood?

How did it come to this?

The scars within.