“Forget it, it wouldn’t make any sense to you.”

“What do you mean?” Ariel asked, rather insistently. I let out a quiet sigh, as I rubbed a thumb against my temple. I could feel her curious eyes on me, waiting impatiently for me to reveal the story behind the little gold coin I had tattooed down the side of my neck, just under my ear. It had been hiding there, underneath the layers of my shaggy hair, for as long as I could remember.

“Thomas,” Ariel started. “You can tell me anything.” I took a breath and forced myself to look in her eyes. Those big, brown, innocent, eyes. Eyes that had never seen hardship the way that mine had.

“Alright,” I agreed. “But you have to promise that you won’t walk out on this date.” She looked at me, confused. “Trust me,” I told her. “There’s a lot that you don’t know about me.” She simply nodded back, and I took that as a sign that she was afraid to make me a promise.

“I got it years and years ago, before I met you. I was just a kid then.”

“How old?” She interrupted.

“14. When I was younger I…” I hesitated a moment, and tried my best to hold eye contact with Ariel. It was time that I admitted this to her. “I was very poor. I didn’t have the best relationships with my parents, and my older brother Derek had a baby to take care of. I was alone most of the time, and I often went to bed with an empty stomach, or a cold, shivering body. There wasn’t much that we could afford, so I didn’t complain, but I always longed for a better quality of life. I would watch other kids my age from outside the malls where I begged for money or food, and they were so carefree.”

“Like me,” Ariel said, tears welling in her eyes. I felt bad. I almost didn’t keep going.

“Yes. Kids like you. Drinking milkshakes and buying new clothes.” I felt my jaw clench. “Throwing away your change out of inconvenience, like that money meant nothing,” I huffed, feeling almost angry now.

“I didn’t know you grew up like that,” Ariel told me, tears now rolling down her cheeks.

“I didn’t want you to. I was embarrassed of where I came from. I still am.” I admitted, feeling my own tears start to bundle in my eyes. I took another deep breath, ready to continue, but before I could, Ariel asked me something.

“So your tattoo… you got it because you wanted money?” At that moment I couldn’t look at her anymore.

“Is that it?” She pushed.

“I knew you wouldn’t understand,” I replied coldly.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “Help me understand, tell me.”

“Ariel, you have always been this spoiled, comfortable, carefree person. Not a day in your life have you suffered. I suffered every single second of my childhood. I was lonely, exhausted and depressed. I was starving. Starving! I never cared about the money, I cared about feeling like something more than a hopeless bug in the street. I wanted someone, anyone, to show that they cared about me.”

“Of course, Thomas. People do care about you.”

“You don’t know me. You shouldn’t assume that’s what my tattoo means,” I told her, angrily.

“But what does it mean then? It’s a coin for god’s sake,” She spitted, confused. We both sat in silence for a moment.

“You’re right,” I told her. “It’s about money. But it’s not about my desire to have it. It’s about my desire to show its worth to the people that don’t appreciate it.” I paused and finally looked back at her. “People like you. You use money as a vice when you’re sad. You buy a new dress for every occasion. You’ve had everything handed to you, Ariel.”

“How dare you say that to me!” She shouted. “I’m not just some spoiled brat who’s never worked for anything!”

“You are! I’ve seen the way you people live! I bet you’ve never even stopped to give a dollar to a person on the street!” I argued. “Ariel, admit it. You don’t understand my tattoo at all. You don’t understand my past.” She opened her mouth to yell something back, but stopped.

“Fine. If I don’t understand you at all, maybe this just won’t work.”

“I guess not,” I said, and I walked right out.