Is it so wrong for me to desire love?

I spent the majority of my life

adrift in an endless loop

of anguish.

Pain becoming so common

I believed it was my salvation.

It's really my mother's fault for

this, she never showed me

what love is.

I'm a puppy sitting doe eyed in the

window hoping someone would

finally pick me.

there are two people that picked

me.

How am I supposed to choose?

I went from undesirable to undeniable

and I have to make a choice.

My first love, a hurricane

wild and destructive, but

it felt familiar.

Even though the world around us

was chaotic it never seemed that

way when she held me.

Whenever the roof of my world

would blow away she anchored

me and help build anew.

There was no flood of life that

could drift us apart.

My second love, a perfectly blue

sky, calm and serene.

With her I forget the hardships

of life and dive headfirst into the

moment.

Her smile warming the darkest

parts of my heart, showing me

a love unbound.

And me a helpless fool trying

to hold onto everything.

careless juggling two hearts as

if love is some kind of game.

Do I really desire love?