I saw him anywhere I went

And the sound of his name

kept ripping my heart apart.

His voice had been everywhere

But now I couldn't even see him

In a glimpse of my sight.

Coming home late Friday night

And didn't feel okay anymore.

I wasn't myself, wasn't anyone

But memories of us which are buried deep in my core.

Days passed. I started screaming

And then became suddenly quiet.

We had nothing. Nothing special.

Nothing that should be meaningful for us.

If so, why was I crying?

Why was it so hard to realise?

To be silent about feelings

While heart kept being ripped apart.

But then I saw him.

Hands started shaking.

I could no longer speak.

Cause we suddenly became strangers.

Everything between was painfully still.

Months passed. It didn't stop hurting.

I didnt stop blaming myself.

But expectations turned out to be broken.

I stopped hoping for the best.

I was no longer dreaming and fighting

Trying to prove me enough.

I gave myself freedom,

Admitted a bit of devil in him.

And by having no desire to suffer,

I finally found peace.