i’m torn between two truths,

so for once i’d like to lie.

i meant it when i said

that i didn’t think you’re the right guy,

because now every time it’s raining,

whenever a song comes on

that we know,

when the movie credits

start rolling,

i’m stuck inside some other show.

we said goodbye,

but as i was walking

there was some sort of

magnetic pull,

like if we were to separate

the folds of time

our lives may not be quite as full.

every time that it’s grey out,

every time i wonder why,

i’m torn between two truths

and every time i pick the lie:

that i didn’t imagine it—

you wanting me to stay,

but between the tears and the rain

i couldn’t see

so i chose to stay away.

i closed my eyes and prayed,

because isn’t a man worth knowing

a man that would’ve stayed?

did you stay who you wanted to be?

because i’m still torn between

two truths:

that there is the person you exist as

and the one i want you to be—

the one i want next to me

in photo booths,

at parties,

at coffee shops,

at dinners.

isn’t that a sign?

but i can’t settle for a daydream,

especially for one that seems to

only be mine.

i’d like to be written in for once,

not just directing the ending scene.

yet you look at me like

i’m an actress,

and you’ll be admiring me then

from the other side of the screen.

imagine what that feels like

when it could be here and now,

but you’d rather settle for saying

you knew me

when i take my first bow.

i’m a potential

worth seeing about,

but the present isn’t particularly

a gift.

you look at me like

i’m a timeline

and you’re waiting for it to shift.

i’m torn between two truths:

i’m too much,

and i’m never enough.

and maybe it could’ve worked,

but that would’ve been

just too rough.