When I look in the mirror, all I see is a person who should’ve been dead 2 years ago, a person that should be six feet under with the rest of her friends, a person who shouldn’t even be able to look into this very mirror.

I think about that accident every second of everyday. It doesn’t matter whether I’m at work, a family gathering, or just laying in bed and staring at the ceiling, it’s always in the front of my mind. I’ve grown restless from it. Anxious.

Guilty

Guilty, a perfect description of how I’m constantly feeling, since it was my fault. I’m the one that suggested going to that abandoned building in the first place. I’m the one that begged them to come, even when they didn’t want to. I’m the one that got them killed.

They sacrificed themselves for me, they let themselves die from that roof caving in to save me.

Me…

…why me?

They had so much more potential to do good in this world than I ever will. They all wanted to do different, yet important things in this cruel world.

Amina, Cora, Zayden…

I’m so sorry…

I’m sorry that all had to die because you all wanted me to live, because you three were selfless, because you three weren’t thinking about how much I would fail you guys by you being gone…

My eyes flicked from the mirror to the newspaper clipping right next to it. I read the wording aloud, my breath growing more heavy with every syllable.

“The former Praitons Office building on Folkmoore’s Grove caves into itself. Three found dead, they were found out to be Amina Stravinsky, Cora Cleave, and Zayden Wilson-”

My voice was cut off by a sob. The next thing I knew, I was on my knees, tears streaming down my face quicker than I could wipe them and thought faster than I could stop.

I wish I thought twice before wanting to explore that building. I wish I listened to my parents when they said that paranormal phenomenons weren’t real. I would’ve saved them if I wasn’t so obsessed with the idea, or I could’ve went on my own and got my fate sealed by myself.

They probably would’ve been able to move on if I died instead of them. They were stronger than me, less sensitive, less of a disgrace…

I eventually managed to get up, managing to wipe away my tears and take a few breaths, which calmed me down a little.

A few minutes later, I was able to get ready and leave the apartment building, going back to my job at Praitons Offices.