May 2009

Clean up takes place near my bed,

But for what seems like the first time

In the past few gruelling hours,

Nobody is about but me and her,

My little bundle wrapped in fresh linen

Up close to my chest, smelling just

Like me, in subtle whiffs of warm honey

That I am so glad only I can experience

This up close, so inviting that a small,

Strange thought comes to me,

One where I could not let anybody touch her

Even if they pleaded with me,

And I could not let anyone look at her

For too long, unless they would

Want to be blindfolded.

I entertain it a little, indulging

In the calm quiet that emerges between

The white walls of the room and us

After I ask for some alone time.

Myself put aside; I don’t mind,

If it is to let her tiny, pillow soft palm

Wrap round my worn finger,

And to watch her mouth comically agape,

_But not crying anymore, are you?_

And it’s also then that I watch with

Sparkling interest, the moment

She opens her eyes for the first time,

Light cocoa gleaming across her iris-

To that, I cheer internally;

‘Yes, she has my eyes!’

And just hope that when her hair darkens,

That, too, will be my unruly shade.

I almost forget where I am, in the

Quiet excitement bubbling through

My chest, so I tell myself to simmer down,

And I also don’t listen to a word,

Caught in tracing her supple cheek,

Eager to know her ten years from now

In _this_ moment, wondering

As I look to the shut blinds, who

My baby girl will be, and holding

Her closer to my heartbeat

With all the love I can muster,

Everything is just as it’s meant to be.