**Tw: a bit implied abuse, implied trauma, implied Ed **

****

Please don't read if any of these will bother you. Take care of yourself. If you are interested in my writing look at my other stories that are less realistic and more fantasy from the book I am in progress of writing.

**_ℓιttℓє ƒℓαρѕ σƒ α вυttєяƒℓу'ѕ ωιηgѕ bring cheer but also мαкє є¢нσєѕ ησвσ∂у ¢αη нєαя. _****_

_**

🦋

A new husband? At the time Ashya didn't know you could get a new husband so quickly..It had been little over four years and Ashya still wanted to understand what a divorce was. She was just a little girl and so many things were changing. She's overhead her mom and dad talking about how they didn't like the ex wife of Dashiell. Ashya would find our when she was older, she wasn't the best person. Ashya was hesitant. She never liked meeting new people. She was told there was a kid her age. Almost a year older. But still very close to her age. Ashya didn't like kids her age. Never did. She always thought they were stupid but oh so badly wanted to be apart of what they were. She wanted to be dumber. To not understand them. To remember things more. But nothing was something she could handle. Her brother Edan was what she couldn't. He was constantly hyper, and physical. No matter what. But her parents had told her not to hit back since she was very little. So she didn't..There were a lot of things in her life that didn't make sense. Her brother got to hit her sometimes. She realized later he was held in a different place than her. Especially to her dad once she hit puberty. But back to Dashiell. He was now someone thathad children. The two children's names were Donovan and Omari. Donovan was a little younger than her brother and Omari was a slight bit older than Ashya. Ashya was very shy at first but soon her and the two boys, along with her brother got along. Ashya grew up in an all boys neighborhood so it was easier to play with boys than girls. The girls at school thought she was weird anyway. So her and Omari got along more then Donovan. Donovan eventually got semi along with her but didn't have what Omari had. Ashya had noticed this when she was being shy with touch. Omari would scoot over every time she would on the couch till they eventually got to the end and they had their legs pressed together. But Ashya soon realized she was okay with Omari. Enough to do innocent things like that. They were only 10 and 11 anyway. Neither ruined by the internet just yet. Omari and Ashya were close. Closer than she'd been with most friends. She hung out with Omari and his brother. Along with Edan. Edan and Donovan got along great. Edan was hyper and the other was as well. Omari and Ashya were quieter and mostly finding things to talk about, getting out of the physical part of playing. They talked about their life and even Omari's sister. Salima was the youngest. But she never went with the boys when they were with their father. Ashya and Omari lived in almost a bliss. He was nice to her so she was nice to him and opened up. She was always nervous when going to family events but always so happy when Omari or his brother were there. The family made playful jokes about how they both 'liked' each other. Of course as children did. Her aunt married his father so now they were happily seeing each other more and more. They'd go play on the trampoline or Omari and her would swing on the swing set in their grandparents backyard. But one day Ashya overheard the adults. They were talking about how Omari was being..violent. He was having outbursts. They were worried and Ashya's mom told her to be careful and that Omari had some problems. Ashya didn't know why, they always were playful and he had never tried to hurt her. But slowly Ashya noticed Donovan was a bit scared of his brother. Ashya called this normal because she herself was a little afraid of her own brother, despite him being younger. Omari talked more about his moms house. His mom seemed like a nice person. Ashya could tell that he cared for his sister. Ashya also was shocked when one time Omari and Donovan talked about how the cat they had, had been poisoned by a neighbor. They didn't really talk about their cats past that. They did always talk about Salima. She seemed to be loved. But slowly after a few times without him, Ashya noticed something changed. Only Donovan was coming to the house for family events and not Omari.. Finally one fateful evening Edan and Ashya's parents sat them down. Apparently Omari had been causing trouble.. Hitting his dad and sometimes my aunt. Ashya was shocked. Her brother only half listening. Omari had been hitting the walls and scaring everyone even his brother. So he'd gotten taken away after a trio. Now held in a psych ward. Ashya was terrified of those, even more so since her brother had been questioned by one when he was having outbursts. Her parents threatened about them constantly since then every outburst. That or military school, sometimes Catholic school. Ashya was slightly worried about her friend. But she soon found out he wouldn't be coming around here anymore... It was fair. She wanted to see Omari. Was he okay? Could she see him again?

A few years had passed since that day, many things slowly slipping away from her memory. But Ashya still remembered him. Everytime she thought of Omari something would happen. Someone would talk about him most the time. Latest Christmas she wanted to send him a gift. But her mom talked about how it had been a few years and how he might think she 'liked' him. So Ashya chickened out on the idea. But only a few days later when his brother Donovan was having a sleepover with Edan he talked about Omari. He was talking about how Omari couldn't stand a music band. Everytime Donovan put it on he hated it. Ashya had barely heard about Omari. The name almost seemed forbidden at family events and his missing presence only seemed to affect her so much. So this little moment brought back the same feeling she'd felt so long ago. She missed him. She'd also never gotten to say a proper goodbye... How she wanted to go back and talk with him once more.

A few months later she forgot about it. Ashya dog sat for her Aunt every year for the anniversary of her and Dashiell. Ashya enjoyed this but everytime she went there she got memories... The guest room had used to be where the boy's bunk beds were. She mostly ignored it. Forcing the memories away like she'd always done. Sure she missed Omari but nobody could help that. She focused on Esley and Emila. The two dogs she was watching. But after three days she was halfway done. Three more days before she was done. Two more nights. Ashya has anxiety and had been off her medicine. She rarely dreams but everytime she did something happened later that day related to the dream. So that night, Tuesday. She took her medicine for the first time in a while and her allergy pills to help with the dogs.

﹏﹏﹏

_She was awake, or was she.. She was watching from afar. Watching herself and Omari. They were younger. Talking about how they hadn't seen each other in forever. Omari and her ran around and went by the apple tree where they used to play make believe. They both had called this tree 'The Wishing Tree' they had taken an apple that had fallen. Ashya watched. Pressed against what seemed to be a glass barrier as the memory played. She could feel herself slightly shake. The imagines there and no there. She could feel herself waking up.. Ashya had a condition where she couldn't imagine any pictures in her mind. So she knew she was waking up as the faces and the words got blurry. _

__

_'I wish you'd promise. We can hang out next time. You always leave so quickly'_

__

_'I'll see you next time. I wish we can keep playing together. This is always fun..'_

﹏﹏

She woke up, with the dogs barking. They wanted out. She groaned softly and slipped on her glasses. Sitting on the side of the bed with the blanket peeled away.. She'd thought of Omari. She hadn't thought about him since late November. She stepped lazily into the other room and let the dogs out. Later her mom can to visit her to give her the vitamins she was missing and her mom mentioned Omari. A memory unlocked. She half laughed. Telling her mom that she'd had a dream about him again. Stupid head. When her mom and visited it was past 1:30pm. Ashya still hadn't eaten. She never ate unless her stomach recognized food. But she was so hungry as her mom heated up some noodles she had brought for her. Never did she expect to think about it again. But...her dreams always meant something. Her dreams the only time she could see anything in her head. Otherwise it was dark and only had flashes of color.

Ashya was surprised when she was scrolling on her phone and her grandparents started to talk about how Omari might be there for the next event.. Shit. Ashya couldn't help the slightest gasp. Nobody noticed. It'd been a few days but her mom still gave her a knowing look as she noticed Ashya's reaction. It wasn't confirmed yet but they were pretty sure about it. Now that left Ashya with questions..

Would he recognize her?

Would he be the same? Well, obviously not. They were both seriously different people. But.. She couldn't help but long for that piece of the past. Would it be real? Could it be real? Or was this just going to be one of the times she saw him but nothing happened.. She missed him but maybe she only missed what she remembered of him. What if he was nothing like his old self.. What if she was nothing like what he liked. She could only wait and see. The supposed meeting in the next coming days. She was worried. So worried that maybe it wouldn't be what she thought. Maybe Omari wasn't the same. Or maybe she wouldn't get to see him again. She didn't know what was worse, the fear of the unknown just for it to be nothing or the fear of the unknown for it to turn into something.

She missed Omari. But did she really know what he was like anymore? Would they recognize each other.. Now Ashya's mom teases her about being a medium/psychic because everytime her dreams mean something. But she couldn't help but wonder. What if her mom was right. What I'd her dream was right. What if they really saw each other and got to be again. To be whatever they were. Friends or a mix of things. But her main focus was not freaking out. But how could see not if it was him. Was he worried to see her too... She couldn't help but think about it. She needed sleep. Sleep and she'd forget. Probably. Secretly Ashya hoped she could reconnect with Omari. Even if it was just for a bit.. Just for a second. _Just to see him again. _