Laying on my bed, staring up at the ceiling, I began losing control of my mind. Emotions and thoughts stirred around in a soup of restlessness and resentment. Not only did Hannah lie to me but she used her lie to pit my friends against me. My thoughts briefly drifted from the hurricane of hateful thoughts to a quote my parents told me.

‘Remember. We all have bad days and feel some deep lows. But writing a letter and throwing it away can get those feelings out of our head.’

Pondering on the modern day version of a letter, I decided to draft a Twitter post and then delete it. This should extract and process these thoughts and emotions better than boiling them in the crockpot of my mind.

My thumbs began a tap dance of legendary proportion, crafting each word carefully with speed and dexterity. The character count began counting down quickly. 2000…1956…1844…1697.

As my typing carried on and my emotions poured and poured from my mind, I felt my eyelids begin to bear down. I felt a big blink. One of those blinks that preempts sleep in the way a warm hug came before feelings of butterflies in one’s tummy.

My thumbs slowed slightly and I could feel reality blurring with my sleep. My eyes jolted open again, fighting back drowsiness. My sleep schedule was about to catch up to me. As my eyes closed again, my thumb drifted over the ‘post’ button as I drifted into sleep. My phone fell to my face, only briefly waking me again before I dozed off for a long night’s sleep.

I awoke feeling rested. I actually got more than eight hours of sleep for once. I let out a big stretch greeting the day. I gave my phone a tap. 8 missed calls. 67 messages. 5 voicemails. 500+ Twitter notifications. One apple health notification.

My stomach sank into the depths of fear and anxiety. What have I done.