Tell the story of a blind date from both perspectives

Every person has a spirit animal that reflects their personality. Your friend has a red panda, your mom has a peacock, your sister has a doe. You? You have an anaconda, and it doesn’t like you very much.

Write a story based on the prompt

You are God, after a couple thousand years of people thinking you don't answer their prayers, you realise you've had yourself on mute on the celestial microphone you use to talk to humans.